5 Years Ago Today I Wrote This...............

One Year Ago Today……

August 1, 2008


One year ago today, was the day I stopped nursing my daughter. (Last Years post)
 One year ago today, I sat holding her while she feed from my body.

One year ago today, was the last time I held her like an infant.

One year ago today, she slept with me and nursed off and on all night long.

One year ago today, I was sad that it was over and I would never nurse another baby again.

One year ago today, I was the last time I saw my friend Lori. We went to see a local play Oliver and had the best time.

One year ago today, I was upset that I would get home to late to nurse her.

One year ago today, I was still fielding questions about when I would stop nursing.

One year ago today, my baby grew up with one night out with a friend.

Nursing my kids was something I knew I would do when I was pregnant. My son was such a natural. He was my first and he took to it like a champ. I nursed him for about 8 months which was as long as he would allow. Then I pumped for another 4 until he was 1.

My daughter on the other hand, was not a natural and because she gave me so much resistance, I felt unsupported by the people in my life for the first 4 days of her life. She was hungry and would not latch on. I finally got in touch with Le Leche and through their support (1 phone call), I got the support I needed to relax and try again and it worked. When she finally got it, it was so easy.

I never felt that it was a job, or a commitment, annoying, hard, it just worked. Having a 23 month old be patient enough to watch me nurse ALL DAY is crazy too. Everyone just did their part and it was a piece of cake. In fact. I loved it. It relaxed me and when it finally was over I realized it was the only time I sat down. On the 3rd day after weaning I realized I NEVER sat down during the day. Nursing forced me to sit and just be! Something a mom with a colicky newborn and a late talking 23 month old needed very badly.

Baby Girl,
I will never forget how much I loved holding you and smelling you as you nursed. I used to take my hand and trace your face and play with your hair as you played with my fingers. Your brother used to come over and say, “baby eat” whenever you were nursing. He didn’t say much but he did tell us when you were crying and when you needed to eat.

You used to call it “all done” which I found so cute. You would come up and ask for all done which meant you wanted to be nursed. I guess me asking if you were all done was a bit confusing.
When we were done I was actually very surprised at how easy it was. You asked for it the next night and I said, “You don’t need it.” You probably only asked for it 3 times. On the 4th night you cried for it but I felt that enough nights had gone by and that you were probably more tired than wanting to nurse. Honestly, if you had cried and begged for it on the next evening after missing the first time I would have caved in.

I love you baby and miss our time together but I think our bond more than makes up for that loss of closeness.

God bless you baby. You are everything Mommy wished for and God intended.
See my rant on breast feeding in public.

15 comments:

Renee said...

My daughter has adopted a "pinch Mommy till she bruises" attitude during nursing here lately, but this post reminds me to enjoy all the GOOD things about feeding my baby and not focus on the negative. Thanks, Maria!

Jennifer Young said...

I cried so hard the last day I nursed my youngest, knowing that I'd never nurse again! I was able to nurse both my girls for over a year each and I loved it. We are adopting a toddler to complete our family, and I'm sad that I won't be able to nurse him and have that same experience.

Ken Ohl said...

what a beautiful and touching story I have not been around as much as I should have working all the time but the love is still there. thankyou, ken ohl pohl19@comcast.net

momo said...

They grow up so fast. I raised four children, all grown and moved away from home now. Enjoy this time while you can.

carschick2000 said...

I loved nursing both my kids too and found it frustrating as neither child were naturals like you son. Although kept trying until it worked for us! I miss that special time of bonding but am enjoying this new phase of parenting too!

RobinB317 said...

What a beautiful story. I nursed all of my child and it really IS the only time you have to sit down and relax.

Lynnette Watkins said...

I nursed both of my daughters. Only my oldest daughter nursed her children. I couldn't convince my youngest to nurse, I wish she would of at least tried.

Sandy VanHoey said...

Loved this story, so very touching. My daughter also nursed then pumped when she had to go to work so they could still have breast milk. She too loved every minute of it and it went by so quickly having her youngest 4 now.

The Freebie Chick said...

Very touching
Holly W

Maria Malaveci said...

Very touching. I nursed both my babies. It was hard for me because I had to work as well and pump every 3-4 hours but it was very important to me that I do it.

Sami said...

Wow, that is so sweet!

dv8 said...

One year ago was also the last time I'd ever see one of my best friends.

moushka said...

I cherished every moment that I nursed all four of my daughters! I was very sad the day came when I had to stop nursing my last baby!

bloomerbear said...

This is beautiful ! You should get this framed....

pattifritz2000 at yahoo dot com
thank you

Nancy said...

Nursing is a very special time for mother and baby. I loved it!

Nancy
allibrary (at) aol (dot) com

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