NEUROPSYCHOLOGIST EXPLAINS HOW TO TEACH YOUR CHILDREN
TO HANDLE EMERGENCIES WITHOUT SCARING THE BLEEP OUT OF THEM
Discussing possible emergency scenarios with one’s
children is never a pleasant topic. Parents do not want to frighten them or
create new anxieties. Dr. Sanam Hafeez is a New York City based
Neuro-psychologist and School Psychologist who has an approach to emergency
preparedness that won’t freak your children out.
Tell children an emergency is something unusual that
happens which could hurt people, or cause damage to things like houses and
cars. Explain to them that
nature sometimes provides ‘too much of something’ like, rain, wind or snow.
Talk about effects of an emergency that children can relate to, such as loss of
electricity, water, and telephone service; flooded roads and uprooted
trees. Explain that everyone is better able to take care of
themselves in emergencies when they know what to do.
First, teach your children the difference between a
problem and an emergency. A problem
is something that they need help with, but does not require emergency services.
An emergency is a situation that requires immediate assistance from the police
or fire department, or requires immediate medical assistance through paramedics
or EMTs. When your child experiences a problem, he or she should decide whether
to call you immediately, call a neighbor, or whether the problem can wait until
you get home. For example, you'd probably want your child to call you if he or
she:
Felt
scared
Had
trouble getting into the house
Got
home and found that the electricity was off
The following issues would warrant an immediate call
to 9-1-1:
A
fire
Evidence
of a break-in
A
medical emergency, such as someone being unresponsive or bleeding profusely
Step One: Create a Communication Plan
Teach your child one parent's cell-phone number or a good contact number. Dr. Hafeez says that,
“Starting at around age 5, kids are developmentally ready to memorize a 7- or
10-digit number. Practice with your child and turn the phone number into a
song, like a modified version of "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star."
Designate an out-of-state contact. This will be a resource and point person for
your family to call.
Choose a location other than your home where your
family can meet. You'll need to
go there in case of a fire or an earthquake, for example. Your meeting place
might be a local park, school, or shelter. Walk to the site with your child so
he/she knows exactly how to get there.
Designate a trusted friend or family member who can pick up your kid at child care or school
if you are unable to get there in a disaster situation. Be sure that you give
official permission to release your child to that person.
Make a card with your plan for each adult's wallet. Include contact names, your emergency location,
and the out-of-state contact number. Put a copy in your school-age child's
backpack, and discuss the plan with your kids.
Inform caregivers and nearby relatives of your plan. Be sure to give a copy of your plan to your child's
teacher too.
If you're not good at texting, improve your skills. When cell- phone signal strength goes down,
texting often still works because it uses less bandwidth and network capacity.
Everyone needs to know about calling 911 in an
emergency. Dr. Hafeez stresses that,
“Kids also need to know the specifics about what an emergency is. Asking them
questions like, "What would you do if we had a fire in our house?" or
"What would you do if you saw someone trying to break in?" gives you
a chance to discuss what constitutes an emergency and what to do if one occurs.
Role playing is an especially good way to address various emergency scenarios
and give your kids the confidence they'll need to handle them”
Dr. Hafeez points out that, “For younger children, it
might also help to talk about who the emergency workers are in your community —
police officers, firefighters, paramedics, doctors, nurses, and so on — and
what kinds of things they do to help people who are in trouble. This will
clarify not only what types of emergencies can occur, but also who can help.”
When to Call 911
Dr. Hafeez explains that, “Part of understanding what
an emergency is, is knowing what is not. A fire, an intruder in the home, an
unconscious family member — these are all things that would require a call to
911. A skinned knee, a stolen bicycle, or an agreement with a school mate would
not. Still, teach your child that if ever in doubt and there's no adult around
to ask, make the call. It's much better to be safe than sorry”.
Make sure your kids understand that calling 911 as a
joke is a crime in many places. In
some cities, officials estimate that as much as 75% of the calls made to 911
are non-emergency calls. These are not all pranks. Some people accidentally
push the emergency button on their cell phones. Others don't realize that 911
is for true emergencies only (not for such things as a flat tire or even about
a theft that occurred the week before).
Work Out a Home Evacuation Plan
In the event of a fire or a natural disaster, your
entire family will need to have a coordinated evacuation plan to ensure that
everyone makes it out of the house safely. Dr. Hafeez stresses that, “It is
important to explain to your child that all material possessions, even favorite
ones, can be replaced and that it’s far more important for them to exit the
house than it is to save their belongings. Make sure that he/she knows how to
get out of the house if you’re not able to reach her, to make her way to a
pre-arranged family meeting place and what she should do when he/she arrives
there first.”
Discuss Region-Specific Natural Disasters
You probably won’t need to waste much time on teaching
a child that lives in the Midwest how to manage a hurricane, but he/she will
need to know what to do in the event of a tornado. Talking about the natural
disasters that are most likely to occur in your area and making a specific plan
to deal with them is imperative, especially if you live in a region that’s
particularly prone to environmental emergencies.
Role Play Specific Scenarios
Dr. Hafeez explains that, “One of the best ways to
determine how much your child knows and what she still needs to learn about
emergency preparedness is to role play specific scenarios that she could
potentially encounter. There’s a reason why public schools practice routine
fire drills: they help kids prepare in a relatively low-stress environment for
an emergency so that, in a high-pressure situation, they know how to react.
Role playing serious injury situations, weather emergencies, a house fire and even
potential intruder situations gives you an idea about what your child knows and
helps you teach them more detailed information so that they’re prepared to
handle any emergency.
After the Emergency: Time for Recovery
Immediately after the emergency situation, try to
reduce your child's fear and anxiety.
Keep the family together. While you look for housing and assistance, you may
want to leave your children with relatives or friends. Instead, keep the family
together as much as possible and make children a part of what you are doing to
get the family back on its feet. Children get anxious, and they'll worry that
their parents won't return.
Explain what will happen next. For example, say, "Tonight, we will all stay
together in the shelter." Dr. Hafeez emphasizes to, “Get down to the
child's eye level and talk to them”.
Encourage children to talk. Let children talk about the emergency and ask
questions as much as they want. Encourage children to describe what they're
feeling. Listen to what they say. If possible, include the entire family in the
discussion.
Include children in recovery activities. Give children chores that are their responsibility.
This will help children feel they are part of the recovery. “Having a task will
help them understand that everything will be all right, says Dr. Hafeez.
Sanam
Hafeez Psy.D
New
York State Licensed Neuropsychologist and School Psychologist
Dr. Sanam Hafeez is a
New York City based Neuro-psychologist and School Psychologist. She is
also the founder and director of Comprehensive Consultation
Psychological Services, P.C. She is currently a teaching faculty
member at Columbia University.
Dr. Hafeez graduated
from Queens College, CUNY with a BA in psychology. She then went on to
earn her Master of Science in Psychology at Hofstra University. Following
that she stayed at Hofstra to receive her Doctor of Psychology (Psy.D.) She later
completed her post-doctoral training in Neuropsychology and Developmental
Pediatrics at Coney Island Hospital.
Dr. Hafeez’s provides
neuropsychological educational and developmental evaluations in her
practice. She also works with children and adults who suffer from post
traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), learning disabilities, autism, attention and
memory problems, trauma and brain injury, abuse, childhood development and
psychopathology (bipolar, schizophrenia, depression, anxiety, etc…) In
addition, Dr. Hafeez serves as a medical expert and expert witness by providing
full evaluations and witness testimony to law firms and courts.
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