Amateur Book Review - Rebecca by Adam Nicolai

PURCHASE

A voice is telling Sarah to kill her baby.

It comes to her in fevered snatches of sleep, between her daughter’s cries. It lingers in her mind when she wakes, alone and sad and scared.

She wants to love her baby, but she doesn’t know how. Suffering from her a deadly disconnect with her sexual identity, Sarah doesn’t even know how to love herself.

So the voice torments her. She will suffer. She will weep.

But she will also endure.

Unforgettable and truly unique, Rebecca takes hold of you on the first page and drags you headlong into the hellscape of a tortured young mother’s mind — a journey that will end with unspeakable horror, or the triumph of a mother’s love over darkness.

You’ll love Rebecca because it’s unlike anything you’ve read before.

Review of Rebecca by Adam J. Nicolai

This debut, self published novel by Adam J. Nicolai is a raw, emotionally charged ride that hooked me from the first few pages until the end that completely stressed me out with the  jaw dropping final scene. 

NOTE: There are some heavy themes (teen pregnancy, emerging sexuality, and the pressure of religious expectations). 

Sarah grew up in a strictly religious household who is struggling with her identity as a lesbian.  She believed that the pregnancy would “fix” her. 

The religious elements capture the judgment and guilt imposed by Sarah’s church and family. Every sermon feels and is directed at her "sin." Sarah feels alone and scared which is written perfectly. You feel all of it.

Sarah appears to be dealing with postpartum depression and has unsettling suspicions about her newborn daughter. Rebecca. Nicolai's writing kept me questioning everything. 

The standout, though, is the final fight scene that without giving spoilers was  heart-pounding and left me breathless. I stopped reading three times to catch my breath. It’s the kind of scene that sticks with you.

If you’re up for a read that’ll stress you out (in a good way!) and leave you thinking, this is it.