Goddess Cracks Me Up But The Eye Doctor Not So Much
After seeing my eye doctor for 14 years he finally retired (SOB) I knew it would happen and as I get older I am sure this will happen more and more but I was hoping he would be my eye doctor until the end of time. Last night I headed in for Goddess' appointment (the poor kid has my eyes) and met the new doctor. She is really nice but it was the end of the day and she was probably tired. My Goddess' is a funny funny girl. She makes me laugh out loud at least 15 times a day. However, I am her mother and find her amazing. So....fast foward to her sitting in the eye doc chair. She is a flippant kind of kid, witty and sarcastic. The doctor has been working since maybe 9, 10, 11? I have no idea. It is 7:45 PM. My kids reluctantly takes off her glasses and shyly answers questions. She is she until you want her to perform.
The eye doc asks her to cover an eye, easy enough. She asks her to read the chart.
The first line...no problem.
The second line..."ummm I can't" Doc says "you can. Try!" She does.
Third line...she again says she can't but doc insists..she starts "R (it's a K), L (it was) something, something and something". I smile. I am use to this. At the beach when she takes off her glasses she waves at me and says, "hi, tan blur".
The doc is looking at me and I am smiling. I get it. She wants me to say something. She is looking at me like I am the lifeguard and she just swam to far. So she patiently asks Goddess, "Is this better, or this?" flipping the glass frames in her machine. Goddess has no idea. again..."this? or this? Goddess...says "I don't know." Doctor is looking at me. I ask, "can you see?" Goddess says, they look the same. "The doctor says, "Okay that is an answer." We do the this or this thing about 5 times. I tell Goddess this happens to me at the eye doctor too. "Blink and step away from the machine then try again." We get a lot of "I can't see, it is too bright, I don't know and they are the same."
After adjusting and the doing the eye chart again, the doctor asks Goddess to read the lines. R, L, blurry dot, squiggly dot, and something. I laugh. The doctor is looking at me. She is not laughing. She is trying to be very nice. She is tired. I am a long time patient but new to her but she really wants to end this. I can tell. My daughter is hysterical to me but to a tired doctor she is annoying. So, I clear my throat and ask some questions of Goddess. Eventually we get the verdict. Goddess' needs new glasses. We knew this already but wasn't sure how much her vision had changed. It changed a lot!!!! She went from a 3 to 4. For every line 20/20 2/30 2/40 and so on, you go up by 25 points. She is up by 100 based on the lines she couldn't read from 20/20. So...new glasses here we come. She loves her frames so we are just changing the lenses.
Moral of this story...leave the humor for the morning. Doctors who are tired make me feel silly. I still think she is funny but will hold my laughing for the car ride home.