Life is starting to return to normal. December was pretty non-existent for me. Surgery was bad, recovery was worse and things are still not right. I head back to the hospital on Monday for another test to see how things are progressing.
Went to Wound Care at the hospital on Wednesday for inspection on my wound (surgical site). Thought they would just clean it, dress it and tell me everything was progressing. After a lot of "uh" and ummm" the nurse told me that there were holes at the top and bottom of my incision. One goes down 1 cm and the other 7 cms. They wanted to cat scan but after 6 since May I refused. Skin was lanced so they could drain and culture fluid. Sonograam performed since I refused cat scan and another will be done when I go back on Monday. If all is not better, another cat scan will be the only choice. Hooray. Not!
Every time I feel like I am climbing the mountain of healing, I snag on a ledge and have to wait for a rope to be tossed down. It is extremely frustrating.
Very sad over the fact that I have no pictures from Christmas. I do a Christmas photo book every year of Christmas morning and have nothing. No tree pictures, no present pictures, no kids opening presents. I sat on the couch and watched Teach and the kids do Christmas.
I have the best husband in the world. Without him I would never have gotten through my hospital release and the first five days home. Thank God he is in my life and can be a pillar of strength and rational when I felt like I couldn't go on. The pain was beyond what I could handle and I couldn't even take care of myself. He took care of the kids, me and himself. Our entire lives orbited around him. He was the sun and nourished and provided for all of our needs, including the very basic. More later. I am just not ready to put it all down. Need more time, not a place in time I want to go back. Will write it all, the good, the bad and the ugly. Not just for my readers, but for me. All of these posts are saved in book form and I want to include it (eventually).
Have been taking the kids to school and picking them up. Pick them up 10 minutes early so I don't have to do the bad rush. Can't walk fast and don't want to accidentally have someone knock into me in the mad, rush to sign our kids out of school. Plus, it makes it easier for me not to have to explain my story over and over again when I don't even know what's going on.
Snow day today. Not sure how much we are expecting but it has been coming down for some time. The kids are excited. Handsome is playing Xbox 360 with his dad and Goddess knows we are playing games today as soon as I finish posting.
Have been working hard to catch up on all my blogging promises. Thankfully everyone has been extremely supportive and patient.
Working with sight words and reading with Goddess...my goodness it is challenging. She has no patience and gets frustrated and quits easily. She isn't applying herself at all which is extremely frustrating to me.
Handsome's class has moved onto subtraction. It was hard for him to change over and he was adding all the math problems his teacher sent home. His dad sat with him and used Xbox games to teach him. It appears as if he has it, we have to keep working on it.
Last night, we worked on capitalization of people, places, and things and special names. It was hard for him to get the concept at first because he knows the first letter of a sentence needs to be capitalized now he is supposed to capitalize in the middle of sentences? What???? I am certain with a little more practice this will be easy but...my patience isn't what it could be. I am always feelings something in my own body that makes me stop to figure out what it is, where the pain is coming from, yada yada.
Have been watching a lot of
Netflix lately. Some really pathetic movies out there can be very entertaining. I suggest:
Mega Piranha...too funny. Classic B Movie with tons of technical errors. Good for a laugh. Love that Greg Brady's character is named Brady and the captain of a ship is like 20 years old with greased back long hair. Oh and Tiffany...what happened to her? Well, she is playing a scientist that can make a helicopter fly on... oxygen when it runs out of fuel. You go gurl!!!!
Teeth...Oh my...a vagina with teeth?! Well, you can only imagine what happens with virginal girl meets crazy, horny boys. Yikes.
Louis CK...probably one of the funniest comedians for me right now. I love him!
Johnny Test..we have watched all 3 seasons over the last two weeks. Goddess and I love this show.
Home Alone 2...We must have watched this 30 times since I came home from the hospital and Teach is telling me he watched it at least 15 times while I was at the hospital with the kids. Thankfully, it was a good movie for adults too or we would be looking to "murder that kid".
Raptor Island...Yuck!
Mega Shark vs., Giant Octopus...umm...really...really bad.
Altered..after having intestinal surgery, this movie was a bit much for me at times. It didn't suck too much.
Haunting of Winchester House..umm..really..really dumb. Even the casting sucked. They had like a 13 year old girl whose lines made her sound like she was 5. Grrr..hated this movie so much and was really disappointed.
Well, that's about it for now. Way more than I planned for my Fragments but I've been away for a while. Had the need to type.
My heart was so full at this time. The love you feel for your child is so strong. I couldn't stop looking at him. As a new mom, I loved every day. I couldn't wait for him to wake from his naps. I wanted to show him the world. My every breath was for him. Nothing else existed and kissing his head 100 times a day was my nourishment. Food was secondary and if I weren't nursing I wouldn't have taken time to eat. Why spend time doing something for me when I existed for him?!
I can't get over how fast things move. His face is still the same but he is now dribbling a soccer ball next to me up and down the hall way while shouting to his sister how to play Wii as he passes by.
This picture, shows quiet, tranquility, and peace. My how times have changed.