Originally posted February 29, 2008
Yesterday’s Xbox time went well. When it was time to shut the box off Handsome totally complied after one “I don’t want to.” I told him that I knew he didn’t want to but that the timer went off and unless he wanted me to unplug it he should make the right choice and turn it off.
We hugged and I thanked him for listening.
But….a few hours before that, we had a really bad moment.
After dealing with him not listening and not staying in time out yesterday I was really annoyed when he decided again not to listen to me. Right now I can’t remember what he said, or what I has asked of him that made me say, “Again, you are not listening to me.” Don’t you remember yesterday? When he yelled back and hit at me. I took him to time out.
He yelled and said, “I don’t want time out.” I told him that I didn’t care what he wanted and that Mommy had asked him to listen and he was to sit in time out until the timer went off.
He fought like a rabid dog and I fought just as hard. It was a street fight right in my hall way. Him fighting and scared and me trying to make my point that he would obey me, not talk back and listen to what I was telling.
We struggled and he wouldn’t sit in time out, I kept putting him back and eventually he knew that fighting and talking wouldn’t get him anywhere but man it was a battle.
When the timer rang I motioned to him and we walk towards each other. I told him that he was put in time out for not listening to me and hitting me. He was never to hit me again and that I was very sad.
He said, “Ok” while looking at me. Our eyes and heart touched and I started to tear. I don’t make a habit of crying in front of my babies but I wanted him to see my emotion. I said, “I’m sad because we fight and we yell. I am sad because I love you and I don’t like us to be mad at each other.”
He was holding something, a little book and asked me what I thought it said. As he asked another tear fell down my cheek. He said, “I think it says, “to make you feel better mom.” which made me tear up more.
I asked him if he knew why I was crying and he said, “because, because…”
My 2 year old came in and she said, “are you crying mom?”
I told her yes then asked my son again if he knew why I was crying. He again wiped my tear and said, “because”.
I turned to my 2 year old baby girl and said, “do you know why Mommy is sad?”
She crossed her arms and then pointed very quickly to her brother and said, “because of Handsome.”
The she said, “did he hurt your belly?”
I told her “no, he hurt my heart.”
They both sat next to me wiping my tears and hugging me. Then my son said, “I love you my heart mom.” Translation: I love you with all my heart. Which I usually follow with “I love YOU with all my heart too.” To which he says, “you’re welcome” followed by a hug.
Ahhhh kids. What you gonna do?